Waka Flocka For President

For the 2016 election, one of our potential candidates is Juaquin James Malphurs, better known to us by his stage name “Waka Flocka Flame”.

For those who don’t know of Mr. Flocka, he is a rapper born in Jamaica, Queens and currently resides in Atlanta, Georgia.

imageFor his presidency he, only wants to make 3 subtle changes to our current laws:

1. To legalize marijuana consumption

2 To make animal presence in restaurants illegal

3. To make the presence of feet, size 13  or larger, illegal on public streets.
Individuals with large feet can however, still use means of public transportation such as busses and cabs.

Flocka believes that in schools, the students should be taught more trade skills and practical skills as well as all of his lyrics. In fact, those who don’t know his lyrics before high school graduation would have to start school again from the third grade.

Flocka also plans on raising minimum wage to 15 dollars an hour (from our current 8.75 dollars in New York)

His view on women’s rights can is that women already have equal rights and that women in this day and age are tough. Not fighting for women’s rights, he says, is more of a respect thing.

As for meetings with Congress, Flocka plans on wearing a tank top and flips flops, instead of a suit and dress shoes, due to comfort and respect issues.

Even with somewhat reasonable requests and a wide fan base that would definitely vote for him, he is still only 28 years old and can not actually run for president because the minimum age requirement is 35.

But, THIS WAS A REALLY GOOD PUBLICITY STUNT IDEA AND IT REALLY WORKED!!!!!

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